| Since I recovered from panic disorder and | | | | powerful in overcoming a fearful situation. German |
| agoraphobia, people often ask me what the | | | | psychiatrist, Viktor Frankl, wrote about this in his |
| major turning point in my recovery was. There | | | | book, Man's Search for Meaning. |
| were many turning points, but if I had to choose | | | | Dr. Frankl had the unique experience of living |
| just one, I would pick the night I made a deal with | | | | through the horrors of the Nazi death camps of |
| God in one of my darkest hours of fear. That's | | | | World War II. Approximately one in twenty-six of |
| because it changed the orientation of my life. | | | | Frankl's fellow prisoners survived. From |
| I wasn't sure if you can really make a deal with | | | | observation and interview, Frankl discovered that |
| God, but I didn't care. In complete and utter | | | | the main difference between those who lived and |
| desperation, I prayed to God that if I could be | | | | those who died was a deep sense of meaning or |
| freed from suffering and have my normal life | | | | purpose in life. |
| back, I would use whatever abilities God gave me | | | | Simply put, the men who lived were the ones |
| in the service of other people. I told God that if I | | | | who had the strongest reasons to live. The |
| were made well, my purpose in life would be to | | | | disproportionate survival of men who practiced |
| help others in times of suffering. Though I didn't | | | | religious faith intrigued Frankl greatly. He watched |
| know it then, this change in purpose made all the | | | | spiritual men of inferior constitution outlive more |
| difference. | | | | robust prison-mates. As a result, Frankl emerged |
| To that point my life had all been about me. My | | | | from the prison camps firmly convinced that a |
| life had been about doing whatever I needed to | | | | sense of meaning or purpose in life is as vital to |
| do to achieve everything I wanted for myself. | | | | our existence as food, water or clothing. |
| Though I hadn't realized it, the purpose I had | | | | I first read about Frankl's experience when I had |
| given myself actually created fear - fear of failure. | | | | agoraphobia. When I read about his experience I |
| When my life was all about meeting my personal | | | | related to the men in the Nazi death camps |
| goals, fear of failure always loomed in the back of | | | | because I felt like I was in prison also, only my |
| my mind. I lived with the anxiety that I may not | | | | prison was a psychological one instead of a |
| reach my goals or get what I want out of life - | | | | physical one. |
| and then what would my life have meant? | | | | Agoraphobia had turned my own home into a |
| Constantly striving, fulfillment and satisfaction | | | | prison. The difference between my prison and a |
| always seemed to be far away in the future. | | | | Nazi death camp was that I had a lot more |
| In making this promise to God that I would live to | | | | control over my release. My prison was of my |
| do good for others, I let go of the anxiety over | | | | own making. |
| reaching my personal goals and found a new | | | | I decided that if a strong sense of meaning and |
| sense of purpose in giving to others. This new | | | | purpose in life could sustain a man through the |
| sense of purpose offers meaning and satisfaction | | | | horrors of a Nazi death camp, then certainly a |
| along the way. I have since found that when the | | | | sense of meaning and purpose in life could carry |
| purpose of my life is to do good for others, I | | | | me through to the other side of panic disorder |
| have a purpose greater than fear, including the | | | | and agoraphobia. I just needed a purpose in life |
| fear of failing. | | | | that was greater than my fear, especially my |
| The need for purpose is one of the most basic | | | | fear of failure. |
| human needs. A strong sense of meaning can be | | | | |