| The camp looked perfect in the brochure and on | | | | participate in camp. |
| the DVD its representative brought to Jackie D's | | | | "We have parents tell us all the time, my kid |
| Stamford home. There was a lake, log cabins, | | | | hates to swim, or my kid hates this sport or |
| family-style dining, a well-trained staff and lots to | | | | that," says Dov Shapiro, a director and co-owner |
| do. | | | | of Camp Chateaugay, an overnight summer camp |
| "I believe summer camp should be rustic and kids | | | | in the New York Adirondacks that draws from |
| should swim in lakes and sleep in cabins and eat | | | | Fairfield and Westchester counties. "Then, they |
| family style," the mother says. "I don't think camp | | | | come here and for some reason it clicks. I tell |
| should be pretentious or too fancy. So I loved | | | | parents that they need to be open to the idea |
| everything about the camp I was seeing." | | | | that their kids may surprise them." |
| Later that summer, after a few tearful calls home | | | | Shapiro suggests parents ask probing questions |
| from her then 10 year-old son, Matthew, she was | | | | about the camp's overall philosophy. His camp, he |
| no longer sure. | | | | says, is devoted to a rustic experience that might |
| "We thought it was the right camp. But | | | | not appeal to a city kid, "although we have a |
| everything about it turned out to the wrong for | | | | busload come from New York City every |
| our son." says Jackie, who asked that her full | | | | summer wanting this, so there are no absolutes." |
| name not be used to protect her son, who had "a | | | | Still, he says, camps have a "feel and an aura and |
| summer that is best described as OK." "Not | | | | you need to understand if that's a good fit for |
| miserable, but not the fun one we had planned." | | | | your kids. So I would ask things like, "Would you |
| This summer her son, a sports loving boy who | | | | describe the camp as fast-paced or slow-paced? |
| prefers being close to home, will enroll in a | | | | How about the atmosphere? Are there more city |
| competitive sports program, spending his summer | | | | kids than suburban kids? What are the camp |
| with friends and older siblings he adores. | | | | traditions? Tell me about the demographics of the |
| Choosing camps, which many families do this time | | | | camp." You want to create a picture in your mind |
| of year, can sometimes be as complicated as | | | | that you won't get from the best DVD." |
| settling on the right college. Experts and parents | | | | Still, even when parents approach the process |
| say it involves understanding your child, his | | | | with lots of diligence there are kids who struggle, |
| temperament and interests, while giving him an | | | | and camp executives say there are some ways |
| opportunity to grow. | | | | to spot those children ahead of time. |
| It's not a given, for example, that a shy child will | | | | Bloom says he would caution parents of "the child |
| be miserable at sleep-away camp or your | | | | who hates the water" to ask a lot of questions if |
| gregarious oldest will thrive after weeks spent in a | | | | swimming in a lake or pool is a daily part of the |
| bunk. A sports or arts related camp may be a | | | | camp experience. "I've seen camp be awful for |
| great fit for children with strong interests in those | | | | the kid who hates water." |
| areas, but some experts suggest they also can | | | | At overnight or day camp, Shapiro says, "I worry |
| be too limiting for some. | | | | about a child who has already had experience |
| Day camps? Overnights? There are so many | | | | being bullied. They tend to be kids who, for a |
| things to consider. | | | | variety of reasons, don't respond well to normal |
| "Paramount over everything else is that the place | | | | social cues. Bullying is something that does happen, |
| is safe, comfortable and has some real standards | | | | especially when you have kids bunk together." He |
| that you can verify," says Gary Bloom, director | | | | cautions parents to ask detailed questions about |
| of New Canaan-based Camp Playland, a day camp | | | | how camps deal with bullying "including how they |
| founded by his father in 1957. He says every | | | | define it." His camp has an expert on staff who is |
| parent's first step should be to make sure the | | | | paid to counsel campers and counselors on |
| camp is licensed or accredited, noting in | | | | spotting and preventing bullying. |
| Connecticut for example, "the state licensing | | | | Shapiro says he has children come to overnight |
| standards are tough and surprise inspections are a | | | | camp as young as 6, but says parents considering |
| regular thing." | | | | such experiences for their children should let them |
| After establishing a basic level of quality and | | | | give it a try by age 9. "If you push it to the |
| safety, Bloom says, "You need to be asking lots | | | | preteen years, then you are often sending your |
| of questions about the counseling staff. You need | | | | children into a situation where they are put in a |
| to know how long they've been around. Are the | | | | group of established friends and it can be hard to |
| counselors all teenagers or are there some | | | | integrate." |
| grown-ups around? And then you need to know | | | | Most children are ready for some kind of day |
| what the typical day is like." | | | | camp experience by first grade, says Alswanger, |
| Then there is the matter of the camp itself, says | | | | who recommends children attend for at least a |
| Bloom. "So ask what is its philosophy? How is it | | | | few weeks (he recommends four) to get the |
| structured? How much time do the kids have to | | | | most out of the experience. "More than anything, |
| themselves? How much is supervised? All of this | | | | you want to give them a chance to get |
| matters and it can vary in how it matters from | | | | comfortable and make some new friends." |
| kid to kid." | | | | What to ask before you choose a Summer |
| Indeed, the camp experience involves a host of | | | | Camp for your child… |
| variables. "Last year, I sent my son off to day | | | | How old are your counselors? Are younger |
| camp with two of his best buddies, says Lynn S., | | | | counselors paired with more experienced ones? |
| a Westport mother of two. "One of his friends | | | | How many of your counselors have worked here |
| was miserable. One loved it and my guy was kind | | | | before and what are their average years of |
| of in between." The child who liked it best "was | | | | experience? If they teach a sport or skill, what |
| the most adaptable and made a bunch of new | | | | are their backgrounds and training? How are they |
| friends." The child who hated it, "complained a lot | | | | supervised? |
| because they swam a lot and he doesn't swim | | | | How do you deal with bullies? What are the |
| well." Her son, "said he was happy except for | | | | camp's discipline procedures? |
| when it rained because there wasn't much to do | | | | What is the camp's philosophy? |
| and he loved all the activities they did when it | | | | Can you describe a typical day? How about a |
| wasn't raining. Unfortunately, the four weeks he | | | | typical day when it rains? |
| went, it rained a lot." | | | | Describe the other campers and their |
| Geoff Alswanger, director of the Long Ridge | | | | backgrounds? |
| Camp in Stamford, says the best all-purpose day | | | | What is the camp's philosophy on diversity? Are |
| camps will offer a "wealth of activities with a | | | | the children predominately one race or religion? |
| balance of structured and unstructured time." And, | | | | How are children grouped? By sex? By age? |
| "there will be a lot of things to do when it rains. | | | | Consider that groupings that lump together |
| Because rain happens." | | | | children from several grades can be problematic. |
| If your child has a passion, say, for soccer or the | | | | What are your emergency protocols? Describe |
| creative arts, Alswanger suggests indulging those | | | | your medical staff. And where is the nearest |
| interests based on their age. "If you are in your | | | | hospital? |
| early elementary years, a summer of one sport | | | | How will you inform me if my child is miserable |
| may be too much. While there may be no harm | | | | and not adjusting well? Will you let me visit the |
| in starting early, you can burn out your kids. A | | | | camp on a non-family day if I am worried? |
| week or two (of a special interest camp) is great; | | | | How do you protect children with food allergies? |
| but try to mix it up with a camp that will give | | | | Do you have flexible hours for working parents? |
| them a chance to experiment with new activities | | | | Do you allow a tuition break if a family vacation |
| and make new friends." Once a child get to her | | | | conflicts with part of the camp session? |
| preteen years, "If sports is the direction they are | | | | Are there other parents or campers who can |
| going in, if it is their goal is to do this on a high | | | | answer some of my questions? |
| school level, I say go for it, bearing in mind they | | | | Are you approved and licensed by the state of |
| may need a few weeks break at some point in | | | | Connecticut, the state where you are located or |
| the summer." | | | | do you have an accreditation fro the American |
| Do not presume because your child has not | | | | Camping Association? |
| expressed an interest in something that he won't | | | | |